First analysis

I remember my first analysis session, although I didn’t know what it was at the time. I was in the final year of middle school (so about ten?), and I was asked to take my desk drawer to a room near the school office. I think assumed I was in some sort of trouble, as this was certainly out of the ordinary.

I waited there for a short while without anyone present, but I don’t believe I was over-worried.

I only recall two parts of the session.

The first is that I was asked if I pick my nails. I said I did, and was asked why. My reply assumed they wanted to know why I picked them instead of biting them (seriously, I don’t think any kid bothered with nail files and clippers), and I remember considering this for a moment before replying that it “gives me control”. By this I meant that in picking I could see what I was doing and choose how the nail removal went, which I assumed wouldn’t be the same with biting (though I’d never bitten so didn’t actually know). Not something I fervently believed, but I knew I had to give an answer, and that made sense at the time.

Hmm…you call a child in for analysis, and he tells you he bites his nails because it gives him control…? I’ve wondered since what was written down about this, but I’m pretty sure these records will have been destroyed long ago. Would be amusing though 🙂

The other part I remember was noticing that the hour and minute hands of the clock didn’t tally – they were in the wrong places with respect to each other. I think this is something I’d registered when waiting on my own, looking round to occupy myself. I think I was asked if there was anything I wanted to say or talk about (I *think*, anyway, this was an awfully long time ago), and I considered bring this clock up, probably because it amused/intrigued me. I have to wonder how *that* would have ended up in the session notes!

The last things I recall were after the session. I was at the front of the class, waiting to talk to the teacher* about something, and I looked at the register/diary and noted a date and time with the text “Tom’s analysis” (or similar). I mentioned this to my mother, who sort of laughed it off, and I have the feeling of a jokey reference to more of a chemical/physical analysis rather that psychological. I’m sure she understood what had just happened, but it could be she either didn’t let on, or I didn’t pick up what she said.

In the past I’ve often wondered what notes were made, and could I have seen them at a later stage?

I’ve just had a new few thoughts:

  • Why did this take place anyway?
  • Should the school have asked for consent to this beforehand?
  • Actually, did it ask, and did my mother know beforehand? Perhaps she invoked it??

I’m not at all worried about the whys and wherefores, merely interested….

* Hmm…. note that I said “the teacher” instead of “my teacher”. Does that have any extra meaning?

 

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